2018-09-04 13:42
Running in circles, wanting to share every shower thought, every brain fart on twitter to collect likes. This is annoying and I think I'm addicted. I could share this sentence on discord in my two groups and get another round of interactions that give me a short high. Working alone from home seems to make this even more important to me. I blocked everything but facebook today, since one of my tasks at work is to keep an eye on our support groups. It took me 5 minutes to end up in my timeline that I've never checked for ages, clicking on a link to a video that I might have watched. Blocking youtube is one thing, but there are many more video hosts these days and I don't think I can block them all.
It really fucks with my time that I need to invest into work, hobbies and sports. My phone is muted, except for phone calls now and lies somewhere I can't see it. Instead of starting to work, I wrote this instead. I changed my facebook link in chrome to messenger.com and added facebook to the sites to block in work mode. blocksite.co as a plug-in for chrome works good so far.
Ignoring social media is hard work. I have this automatism where I open the browser and open all SM sites at once to check if something happened. I can stare at and refresh these pages for ages.
Now I turned to procrastinating, mainly cleaning up stuff and cook my lunch. Not necessarily a bad thing though, since this means I do stuff I would normally not consider doing. Having not payed immensely for food makes me happy, although it's not even a pizza. Trying to find my highs in accomplishing goals and chores today.
Whenever I read something in a support group and decide it's nothing I can help with, I turn to check on every social media site again. Funny how time perception works, I was focused for 15 minutes and it felt like 1 1/2 hour. I found a bug and fixed it - time to do some more cleaning.
Resume at the end of the day: pretty happy, noticeably more time on my hand, I even started a course on babble to learn Italian (after work of course!). Tomorrow I will get up early to do go to the gym.
in the end I managed to work a bit on this site as well, not the best code but a step forward!